(HOW TO) CURB YOUR STRESS

As mothers, when shit really hits the fan, we somehow miraculously become even more composed. Say your kid starts choking on a Dorito (happened to us 3 years ago on Halloween night) – do you panic and scream? Or do you suddenly become eerily calm, incredibly responsive and solution based? This is the gift of parenting and it most certainly applies to the state of crisis and chaos we are finding ourselves in today. The way we choose to react, interact and use our energy is entirely up to us, and it is literally the only thing we can currently control.

Of course, many of us find it hard to hone in on this sense of calm as we are (rightfully) clouded with fear, sadness, anxiety and uncertainty. In addition to the grim tone of the news every day, we are dealing with sickness, job loss, business loss and sudden isolation. All of these things combined cause severe anxiety, incredible levels of stress, and can cause long-term damage to your health. But we don’t have to tell you that… we’re sure you’re already starting to feel the effects and they are very very real.

Even though literally no-one knows what the impact of this crisis will be in a week / month / eternity, keeping yourself and your family mentally and emotionally healthy is priority number one. We must stay calm under pressure. We must give ourselves space to think, to process. Only then we can make rational decisions in the face of chaos – right? We’re not actually sure, but we sure as fuck are going to try.

So babes, how are we going to get through this absolute shit show? Here are some tips from us that can hopefully help. And remember, WE ARE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER. Absolutely no-one knows what the fuck they’re doing or what the future holds, but we’re pretty confident that this collective stand-still will only serve to unify us later.

KNOW YOU’RE NOT ALONE. Know that everyone you know – from your friends, coworkers, acquaintances, in-laws to the the barista at your local cafe and your eyelash technician and everyone in between is living through this hell too.
SLOW DOWN. You don’t have to react immediately. A.k.a. you don’t have to jump to comment, share, or give your opinion the moment a piece of information is released. Give yourself a moment to process information. Think about all the implications. Be silent.
MANAGE YOUR MEDIA. There’s a fine line between staying informed and becoming completely overwhelmed with information. We humans have a tendency to drown ourselves in bad news, constantly refreshing and searching for new insight. It’s not only important to dial down on traditional TV / radio media but especially important to break from social media, which can be vague or sensationalized. Watch the news once in the morning, and once in the evening and leave your phone in a distant room for a few hours. Make this a habit.
STAY POSITIVE. When stressful situations happen, your mind races in a million different directions and creates all kinds of hypothetical situations that may never materialize. Pay attention to your thoughts. Stop yourself from spiralling down this hole and focus on something positive, no matter how small. The beauty in the simple things will become most important now.
TAKE CARE OF YOUR BODY. Continue to eat a balanced diet (now you’ve got all the time in the world to cook!). Continue to exercise – even if it’s 20 minutes a day or with your children (least it’s an activity!). Meditate (this doesn’t need to be an out-of-world experience – it can simply mean sitting in silence for 5 min with your eyes closed and concentrating only on your breath). By staying on top of your health, you will inadvertently increase your self-control and emotional intelligence, which, in turn, will help you respond well to emergencies.
LIMIT CAFFEINE. Although it’s a comforting habit and may seem like a good idea for long days in isolation (especially with the spawn all up in your shit) the caffeine crash that follows a couple cups of java may leave you feeling lethargic and depressed OR jittery and even more stressed – options no-one needs. Stay hydrated, babe. Drink loads of water instead.
CALL A GOOD FRIEND OR CLOSE FAMILY MEMBER. Now is the time to use your support system (couples with technology) and reach out. We are all experiencing very difficult circumstances, and it helps to talk it out with people you trust. They may offer a different perspective and help you arrive at potential solutions and ponder new approaches. When you reach out to those you trust, you feel grounded, safe, and strong enough to push through.
CREATE A COPING STRATEGY. If you feel yourself losing control, implement a coping mechanism that works. Go for a brisk walk alone or re-read your favourite book or take a long shower (end it off with a burst of cold). These go-to solutions will help you feel more empowered and will release some immediate stress. (Shooting tequila doesn’t count).
FIND OTHER THINGS TO TALK ABOUT. It’s hard to get out of the cycle of focusing on the crisis at hand, and all the moving parts around it, but this will just amplify your anxious state. Find positive news (it’s out there), brush up on some new cultural lit, look to people in the arts and creative space who can offer different materials to lose yourself in.
USE YOUR TIME WISELY. Spend quality time with your kids. Work on projects you’ve been putting off. Slowly repair your home. Read actual literature. Pick up an instrument. Garden. Make that damn photo wall happen. These are all forms of therapy themselves and will give you some peace.