HOW TO GET YOUR KIDS READY FOR SCHOOL IN, LIKE, 12HRS

Apparently, school starts tomorrow.  I know you’ve left things until the last minute preparing for the best day of the year, but you need to know that you are alongside countless rebels in frantic mode trying to get ready.  

Throw away your mom guilt and cut yourself some slack.  I’ll give you a glimpse of what thousands of mothers are currently going through.  And because you are all frantic, I’ll make this brief.

• You’ll be looking for the labels you bought to carefully apply to all of your kiddos new stuff.  Apparently, they are nowhere to be found.  After an hour, you will realize that you make far more money in a hour than it costs to buy new labels.  So you order more.  And use a Sharpie in the meantime.  Life goes on.

• You will realize that you haven’t purchased half the food you need to make those Pinterest lunches that had you hyperventilating all week. 

Don’t sweat it.  Your kids won’t eat it anyway.  What those Pinterest moms don’t show you is that the lunches come back the same, but soggy.  At least the containers you bought are cute.  

*A note to the moms who are new to school lunches:  your kid won’t eat more than half the lunches you make.  And they won’t die, promise.  They’ll eat eventually.  TRUST ME.

• If you are taking a last-minute frantic trip to the Eaton Centre (because it’s the only mall open on Labour Day), have a glass of wine before arriving.  Oh, and high-five every other mom there who is also looking for the same perfect outfit, shoes, back packs.  You are not alone.

• About that.  Don’t spend a shit ton of money buying all these clothes.  Your kids will insist on wearing the same ugly t-shirt… Every. Single. Day.  As a type-A person myself, I’ve given up on providing outfit choices.  It almost always ends in arguments, and you almost always lose.

• Instead of struggling to make things perfect, drop it all and go spend time with your kids.  It’s the last day of summer, enjoy it!

And tomorrow, when they refuse to wake up – because, ooops you also forgot to get them to bed on time – just keep yelling, “resistance is futile, you will be educated”.

Happy First Day of School, Rebels!

 

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